Posts tagged being true to yourself

Swallowing the Conflict to “Keep the Peace.”

Conflict is messy.  Not many of us are skilled at it.  Sometimes, it is tempting to try bypass it altogether to “keep the peace.”  I’m not talking about choosing a battle because a particular issue is not a big deal.  I’m talking about when someone crosses a line and you feel violated but decide to […]


Being with Things As They Truly Are

I haven’t written in this blog for a while because my household has been doing what I call “Immunity Boot Camp.” All of us have had multiple illnesses since our daughter started preschool in January. Needless to say, writing here was on the bottom of the to-do list. It may still be a low priority […]


Learning Who We Are by Puzzling Our Selves Together

The other day, my daughter and I saw an interesting drawing: it was of a puzzle being put together by a child who was in the puzzle itself.  My daughter had questions.  Why was the child in the puzzle?  Why was the child doing a puzzle?  She forced me to think about this drawing in […]


Being Truthful in Relationships Means Sometimes Saying What People Don’t Want to Hear

At some point in all real relationships- whether romantic, parental, or platonic- one person is going to do something that the other person dislikes. It is impossible to be genuine and truthful in relationship without sometimes disappointing or frustrating the people you have relationships with.  Communicating in advance, and following through with what has been […]


Act Like You Deserve Love

Telling yourself that you deserve love is one thing, but actually believing it and acting like it is something else. If you grew up believing that you don’t deserve love, then that belief has ruled your relationship actions for your whole life. Lifelong actions become habits. Turning those habits around takes awareness and practice. If […]


You Can’t Be True to Yourself without Someone Getting Disappointed

Originally, I was going to title this post, “You Can’t Be True to Yourself without Disappointing Someone.”  Then I thought about something that I tell people when they worry that making a tough personal choice will hurt or disappoint someone: “You are not disappointing that person, their expectations of you are disappointing them.” This is […]


The Dishwasher of Inevitability

As a kid, I absolutely loathed the job of emptying the dishwasher. One day, I was playing with a friend, and my mother told me to do this dreaded task. I felt that this was incredibly unfair, and voiced my opinion quite loudly. I made my arguments, I fought it, I listed all my reasons […]