When I was younger, I chose some pretty awful boyfriends, so breaking up with them was a no-brainer. I felt justified because they clearly didn’t care about me anyway, or they had done some terrible thing, or they did the dirty work of breaking up with me. I really preferred to be the heartbroken one […]
If you are asking the question, “Do I deserve love?” then you probably were treated as if you didn’t at some point in your life, most likely during your childhood. You were born deserving love- every one of us was. If you did not get that love, for whatever reason, then you sustained a tragic […]
How often have you wanted to do something, but were afraid to because you wouldn’t want to be “that” sort of person? Perhaps you want a little more attention from your partner, but are afraid to ask, because you don’t want to be that self-absorbed, narcissistic attention hog. Maybe you want to ask for a […]
As a new parent, I am re-learning many things. One lesson in particular is about getting attached to expectations, versus understanding the reality of a situation. When we have an expectation that has very little to do with reality, and more to do with our desires, we can easily become frustrated. Learning our baby’s napping […]
It has been quite some time since I’ve written, but I want to say that this blog is not dead! I’ve taken a bit of a hiatus, because I gave birth to my first child recently, and things like this blog are hard to keep up with. I hope to post a thing or two, […]
Many TV shows and movies are about revenge. In the general plot of most crime shows, the wrongdoer is not only captured, but the detectives interviewing them make sure to let this person know just what a scumbag he or she is for what they did. Often, there is also some tasteless joke (if the […]
Today begins another New Year. I have mentioned before that I am not a fan of New Year’s resolutions. They are often hard to commit to, because they are made at an arbitrary, externally given time. It is much easier to make changes when we have reached our own understanding of why such changes are desirable […]
Originally, I was going to title this post, “You Can’t Be True to Yourself without Disappointing Someone.” Then I thought about something that I tell people when they worry that making a tough personal choice will hurt or disappoint someone: “You are not disappointing that person, their expectations of you are disappointing them.” This is […]
My husband’s parents once told me the story of how he learned to ride a bike. Apparently, he hadn’t quite figured out how to brake, and the concept scared him. His solution was to ride full-speed into a group of trash cans. For some reason, this was a less scary way to stop than braking- […]
“Imagination will often carry us to worlds that never were. But without it, we go nowhere.” Dr Carl Sagan As children, most of us were encouraged to use our imaginations. Some of us had imaginary friends, some of us believed that our stuffed animals were living companions, some of us believed in Santa Claus, and […]